eyes closed

i hate titling posts. there, i said it. the truth.

however, i think this particular title will show up on this blog frequently.

see, i wish i were an artist. true, there are many definitions of "artist." but, to me, the word itself always implies one who can execute a drawing or painting, of the realistic sense.

my personal opinion that i possess zero talent for this was confirmed when i was a pre-k teacher. i had recently become part of a literacy program; one of the activity suggestions was to "story tell" while drawing pictures. i drew a person. the children thought it was a dog. they became confused. i accepted my lack of talent.

so, anyway, i obviously have a love of and appreciation for art.

at the creek, a very sweet lady introduced me to a great way to "be an artist" in my eyes.

the concept is simple: paper, pencil, crayons/colored pencils/markers/oil pastels (you get the picture). close your eyes. put the pencil on the paper. for a few moments, without picking up the pencil, make lines all over the power (let your wrist freely move over the paper).

then, look at it. what do you see?

here's what i saw tonight.

do you see what i saw? a pregnant woman, lovingly looking down at her belly.

this is a woman who knows what she wants.

this is a woman who is experiencing another level of love, and family.

to be her, staying in recovery, moving toward "recovered," is a necessity.

this is who i want to be.