craftiness. insanity. life.

Tuesday, August 2, 2011


so, tonight ED gave me a few reasons to not go to a support group: 1) your friend won't be there 2) you might have to sit in traffic and be late 3) you're too tired.

i'm glad that the rational brain won.

tonight, i was again reminded of what loving parents i have now, and had growing up. listening to others as they work through their past, i found myself almost ashamed of dealing with ED and not having all of the baggage that some of the other amazing ladies in the group are stuck lugging around.

then i remembered: unnecessary guilt=Ed thoughts. i stopped.

on the way home, i talked with a lady that has inspired me so much, and with who i hope to genuinely become great friends.  i found myself thinking "let it be" (yes, i love the beatles) and just live life. day to day.

overcome with emotions, i felt the need to call my dad, the one who literally carried me to the path to recover. instead of feeling guilty, i allowed myself to be grateful. and i told him (note: this is big. words are hard for many of us dealing with ED).

i am grateful to have had a happy childhood.

i am grateful to have had a supportive family.

i am grateful to have parents who approve of and love my husband. (BIG ONE HERE)

above all, i am grateful to be alive. life is good. very good. amazing, in fact.

and, i am fortunate to say, my family, the one i was born into and the one i now have through marriage, is a large part of that.

until next time,

LIVE life. LOVE yourself. CREATE recovery.


kdub said...

Love it!

PrincessJenn said...

There's nothing rational about ED's. I'm so glad you have support groups that can help you. There's also some amazing ED support groups on Twitter,too, like @VoiceinRecovery

jana0926 said...

I'm so glad you went and have found amazing support. My sister still deals with a long-running ED and even though her weight is stable, it's hard to watch her struggle. Sending love to you from the #BHAH blog hop.

Hamlet's Mistress said...

My husband and I have a friend who has battleded an ED for ever it seems. She just underwent mitral valve surgery. She alluded to the two being related. I'm so glad you're not giving in to ED's thoughts and taking control. Coming to you from BHAH.

My Bottle's Up! said...

kimmy kim kim, i'm so proud of you. you are a beautiful warrior. xoxo!